I'm Not Ready for a Rocking Chair Yet

When I think of a rocking chair, I think of an old grandmother rocking back and forth with a crocheted blanket wrapped around her and the only way she can get up out of the rocking chair is if someone helps her up and passes her a cane. I am going to be a grandmother, for the first time, this August and I am not ready for a rocking chair yet.

When I first heard I was going to be a grandmother at the age of 48, I was quite happy about it. My own mother was a grandmother at the age of 43. That is probably why I am so "okay" with it. It might have been a different story if I was only 43.

The word grandmother has a stigma to it. As soon as you hear the word grandmother you automatically think "old". You automatically think "frail". For me to become a grandmother, I won't have this stigma attached to me because I don't feel "old" and I don't feel "frail". I have a lot of life left in me yet and I'm not going to let the fact of becoming a grandmother take that away from me. I don't even give that a second thought anyway.

I want my grandson to know that I have spunk and energy. I don't want my grandson to think that I am old, wrinkled and washed up. Heck, I don't even have a wrinkle on my face anywhere.

I don't want my grandson to think that I am going to be the type of grandmother to take him to a park and sit on a park bench and watch him play. I want my grandson to know that I will get up off that bench and play with him.

Now, all this talk about being old and frail is actually quite hilarious if you knew my situation right now. I have serious back issues and I can't walk very far these days. I can't stand for very long periods of time. So, it looks like the joke is on me. With that said though, I will never have to worry about my grandson thinking that I am frail because no matter how much pain I am in everyday, I still get up and do things. Each day, I wash the dishes, do the laundry, cook the meals, etc. I do not sit all day long and do nothing. I know that my grandson will see that. He will see that even in pain I can be a grandmother to him and not just someone who is old and frail.

It is very important to me for my grandson to think of me as a person that works hard under any circumstance because in thiis day and age I have learned that if you want something out of life you have to work hard to get it, pain or no pain. The reason this is important to me is because I never want to be known as old and frail. I don't feel like I'm going to be 49 this year, I don't think I look like I am going to be 49 this year and I know I don't act like I am going to be 49 this year.